Archive for January 2016
Why Millennial Parents Just Might be the Best Ones Yet
As a Millennial,
I am offended by this.
See what I did
there….
I am certainly
amused and a little irritated by it though. Millennials are being touted as
entitled because we demand fairness. We are called lazy because we have a world
of information at our fingertips and use it to solve problems quickly and
efficiently. Millennials are called narcissists because we take selfies and
enjoy sharing our lives on social media. Are you kidding me? Are Millennials
the first generation to take pictures of themselves, or is it maybe because we
now have a multifunctioning camera with us at all times, as well as hundreds of
followers who like looking at our face? Remember when people used to sit in the
same position for hours and hours to get their portrait painted? And we are the
narcissists? Riiiight.
Millennials
went to college as tuition rates skyrocketed and wages stayed stagnant. Forbes
magazine says, “Since
1985, the overall consumer price index has risen 115% while the college
education inflation rate has risen nearly 500%. According to Gordon Wadsworth,
author of The College Trap, “…if the cost of
college tuition was $10,000 in 1986, it would now cost the same student over
$21,500 if education had increased as much as the average inflation rate but instead education is $59,800 or over 2
½ times the inflation rate.” (Emphasis
mine)
So
when people tell us that we are entitled or 'just want a handout' when we ask
for cheaper, or god forbid, free college tuition, it really grinds my
gears. Students these days are leaving college with an average of $30,000 in
student loan debt. Debt that follows us for life. Debt that can't be charged
off in bankruptcy, debt that will garnish our wages should we ever decide to
stop paying it. Large sums of debt that
students just did not need to take out 30 years ago because tuition prices
weren't astronomical like they are now.
Not
to mention, because we joined the labor force during the “Great Recession”, we
are in the most competitive job market in decades and the expensive degree is
no longer a guarantee of a job like we were led to believe. Even though having
a degree increases your earning potential quite a bit over a lifetime, it has
now become equivalent to having high school diploma 20 years ago. You need one
just to get in the door at most good jobs. Try to complain about it, and listen
to baby boomers tell how they just “hit the pavement” to find a job. Sure,
we'll just walk down Main Street and ask for a job at Hooper's Store, or
Macintosh's Fruit and Vegetable Stand. (A+ if you get the reference) Just be
like “Hey are you hiring?” Let the manager look you up and down and he'll be
like “You look like a fine, outstanding young man, I think you'll do.” (A++ if
you get that reference) and BOOM! You're making $60,000 a year and you'll get
that debt paid off in no time and then you'll be ready to buy a house and start
a family!
Which
brings me to another point: Millennials get shit for not buying homes and cars
like previous generations have, instead choosing to spend our money on food,
smartphones and electronics. As The Atlantic's snarky piece “The Cheapest
Generation” points out, “Since World War II, new cars and suburban
houses have powered the economy and propelled recoveries. Millennials may have
lost interest in both.” How could that be? What on earth would possess
a young person to choose public transportation, bicycling, zip cars and Ubers
over wheeling and dealing with slimy car salesmen for a $30,000 (on average) piece
of metal that starts losing value the second it's driven off the lot? Why would
they balk at car payments, insurance costs, tabs/registration fees, and gas
prices, oil changes, parking fees and regular repairs and maintenance? Don't
they care about the economy?!?! Why would they choose to keep another car off
the road that pollutes the environment, increases already gridlocked traffic,
is one of the top causes of serious injury and death and most importantly,
requires you to STOP looking at your phone for extended periods of time?!?!
Are
we really that cheap, or did we just emerge from a generation that aggressively
bought things they couldn't afford, didn't really need, and paid dearly for it
when it was time to collect? Millennials watched their parents lose it all when
the housing market collapsed, unemployment soared and home values plummeted. They
watched their parents lose their jobs, go into foreclosure on their homes and
default on their credit card payments. At the very least, they came away with a
sense that the American dream wasn't what it once was, or even what they were
told. Now that things have started to stabilize since the recession, we have
found that mortgages are very difficult to get and not necessarily worth it
when we're leaving school with an entry-level job that pays $15 an hour and a
shit ton of debt we aren't sure how we are going to pay back. Mortgage
companies are more stringent with their loans than ever (over-correcting, it
seems, from the sketchy lending they were doing a decade ago.) and wages aren't
even increasing with inflation, so it's costing us more money and we are
getting less for it. Yooooooooo! Sign me up!
"Ninja, please!"
2006 was the golden age of mortgage lenders.
2006 was the golden age of mortgage lenders.
Now,
we are establishing ourselves in the labor market, starting to settle down and
becoming parents. 60
million millennials will become parents over the next decade. We are surpassing
baby boomers as the largest population demographic in the country. We're here!
[Some of us] are queer! Get used to it! And we're having babies! I say we,
because obviously I am one of the Millennials who is having babies. More
specifically, had babies. I got
started on my family quite a bit earlier than most of my Millennial
counterparts thanks to the Hayes Super SpermTM, but I am a Millennial
parent nonetheless, and I can tell you that we, as a whole, are doing a pretty
damn good job. We may just be the best generation of parents ever, and here's
why:
1.
We are determined not to make the
mistakes our parents made.
Because we
grew up over-scheduled, special snowflakes with an expectation of achievement
we weren't sure we could actually live up to, we aren't going to put those
responsibilities and labels on our kids, and hopefully avoid the anxiety and
crippling fear of failure that comes along with them. Today's Millennials
remember being shuttled from piano, to soccer, to scheduled playdates and
recitals, to Costco, birthday parties and beyond all in one Saturday. We see
and feel the damage that causes, and will not do it to our own kids. Millennials
know that kids thrive when they are allowed abundant unstructured, pretend play
that fosters creativity and makes kids responsible for their own fun. While our
parents certainly had our best interests at heart, it wasn’t necessarily the
best way to raise a child.
We also now
know that while every kid really is a
special snowflake, they all can't be praised for the same things and in the
same way. We know that instead of telling our kids they are geniuses, we tell
them that their good grades show just how hard of a worker they are, so they
place their intrinsic value on hard work and not on innate abilities. We know
that kids develop a much stronger and more sustainable sense of self-esteem if
you praise their work ethic rather than their intelligence or skill.
We give our
kids agency, and run our households more like a democracy than a dictatorship.
Millennials just believe in treating their children like little humans with
their own feelings, thoughts and ideas. We offer them choices, reason with
them, and offer guidance, but ultimately let our kids make their own choices
and deal with the consequences, good or bad. We don't want them growing up with
an inherent fear of authority figures and desire to comply. We want them to be
respectful of others and their superiors in their life, but we encourage them
speak up if they disagree with something and take responsibility for
themselves.
2.
We are progressive liberals.
Much to the
chagrin of anyone who supports Donald Trump or Ted Cruz in the upcoming
election, as a whole, Millennials are increasingly liberal. Aside from the
great red/blue political divide that seemingly puts all of us on opposite sides
of each other, this is actually really good for our society. Millennials are
more accepting of those who are different than they are especially marginalized
groups, minorities and people of different income levels. Millennials have the
highest levels of empathy and compassion of any previous generation. They
support LGBT rights, they fight against racism, misogyny and income inequality
and they do not support war or political aggression they deem unnecessary.
Millennials know that embracing people from all different walks of life
improves the quality of life for all Americans and helps us grow as people.
Face it, old white dudes aren't going to run this world for very much longer,
and Millennials know that equality isn't just the right thing to do, it's a
good business strategy. There's a reason that zealots and evangelicals and racists are screaming so loud. They know
their support is wavering and that public opinion of their ideologies is
declining. They're shouting the loudest because their old ways of oppressing
everyone but other white dudes isn't gonna fly. It's the wail of a dying man. A
dying white man.
National debt
in the trillions, an endless war we still seem to be fighting, a disappearing
middle class, black lives being devalued, women being blamed for their own
rapes, children starving in one of the richest countries in the world and you
think selfies and ‘the gays’ are ruining this country? Fuck you, Helen. Fight
me.
3.
We are painfully optimistic
Despite the
terrifying financial climate we grew up in and the seemingly rigged political
climate that we are now a part of, Millennials still believe the best days are
ahead. Bentley University says, “Research studies consistently find millennials, ranging in
age from 14 to 34, to be inexplicably positive despite facing higher levels of
student loan debt, poverty and unemployment, and lower levels of wealth and
personal income than any other generation in the modern era.” Despite the fact that the baby boomers (the “best
generation”) consumed and almost depleted every single resource they could get
their hands on, despite that we will likely be retiring without a social
security or Medicare system that we have paid into since entering the
workforce, despite that we are the lowest paid demographic, we are still
positive! Maybe it's the fiery passion and idealism that comes with
being young, but we Millennials feel pretty damn excited about the future, and
optimism is what helps power social change and can bridge gaps between what is dreamed
and what is possible. We are changing the world, and we are going to pass that
optimism and positivity on to our children, who are also going to go on and do
great things. It's the circle of liiiiiiiiiiife! Yaaaaas!
4.
We are the most educated
generation....like....ever.
We know stuff.
We're smart. We have many leather bound books. We grew up in the digital age
and we now know how to harness a wealth of information right at our fingertips.
I promise, we'll only use our fingertip powers for good! Except for maybe
Tinder. I wouldn't know because as I said, I left the dating game long before
many in my generation were even thinking about putting a ring on it. Tinder
could be a sophisticated place with reasoned choosing of mates and intellectual
banter…I really don't know, but man, am I glad to be out of the game! Right now
I'm blogging in my Gryffindor hoodie and yoga pants, watching Making a Murderer
and eating goldfish crackers and drinking Sprite Zero LIKE A BOSS, so basically
my ideal night, and somehow Steve still finds that attractive! You know what a
hard sell that would be on Tinder?!
Haha swipe
left, amirite fellow young people? Haha lol :P :P! Netflix and chill!
Bae!
Anyway, in
addition to holding the world's information in our pockets, we are apt problem
solvers and use that information to solve problems with the least amount of
work involved. That's not laziness, it is efficiency. We also have the highest
number of college graduates of any generation, with over half of them being
women! Yaaaas queen! Get it! Educated parents raise children who achieve more,
are more successful in their occupations and are inherently less aggressive and
violent.
5.
We value ethics and sustainability
over profits
Millennials
hold businesses to a higher standard than their parents and grandparents did.
They don't just look for the lowest price; they are looking for companies that
have pledged to run their business sustainably and ethically. Millennials grew
up in a time where scientists were telling them that climate change was ruining
our planet, and that humans were in fact directly responsible for accelerating
that process by wasteful consumption. They were told to “go green” to save
money and the environment, and while many companies only jumped on the green
bandwagon to make more money and appeal to their demographic, Millennials are
taking that advice to heart. They know this is the only planet we have, and
pledge to treat it better than previous generations. I am a little cynical
whenever I hear a baby boomer talk about environmental issues. As a matter of
fact, at the vacation house we recently stayed at, there was a sign that said “Please
help us protect the environment by turning off the AC when you leave house” and
a part of me was just like, “Do you really mean that, or are you just trying to
appeal to us by using buzzwords so you can save money on your electricity bill?”
Millennials have said they will spend more on a product if they know the
company is running their business ethically. They are looking for
environmentally responsible companies who won't use every resource and
cost-cutting method just to improve their bottom line. Millennials also value a
company that is socially responsible; they won't give their business to
companies that exploit their employees and trade partners for profits, as
demonstrated with widespread boycott and scorn toward Walmart. They demand that
employees earn a living wage and get treated fairly. They want employees to
have good health insurance and acceptable working conditions.
A Civics lesson from a slaver. Hey neighbor
Your debts are paid cuz you don't pay for labor
'We plant seeds in the south. We create'
Yeah keep ranting.
Millennials
also value community and shopping locally. They know that large corporations
don't always have their best interests at heart, and can see that stimulating
the local economy benefits their community as a whole, even if that means
higher prices and less convenience. That said, they are still fiercely loyal to
some of the cutting edge companies they grew up with that offer the best
services, like Amazon, even though Amazon has become quite the corporate giant itself,
gentrifying local neighborhoods and muscling smaller competition out of the
market. Free 2 day shipping? Drones dropping off packages at our house?
Streaming of movies and shows on all our devices for one low price?
Yaaaaaaaas! Oh, you say Amazon is becoming
the Walmart of book sellers and working their employees to the bone (albeit
paying them well)? Yikes. That's a problem for us to worry about later, after
we get through Season 4 of Downton Abbey.
Dowager Countess is my spirit animal.
We aren't
perfect. We are admittedly distracted by all this technology and perhaps our
kids won't thank us later for broadcasting their entire lives, from their first
poop in the potty to their first awkward date, out to hundreds of others on
social media. But armed with a desire to overcome the shortcomings of the past
to create a brighter and happier future by using all the tools that technology
and globalization has to offer, I think we are gonna do all right. And so will
our kids.
